das vater unser

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mmhm. i haven't posted in so long. and i apologize. it's just that time tends to mull me over in its brain and mouth before spitting me back out so i can regain some measure of stability.

today i spent the day at lacma and bcam again. then i ate lunch at andrea's and finished my art criticism essay at the starbucks next to whole foods, sitting with adel and ashley. i wrote about max pechstein's lord's prayer.
then i went straight to dr. chang's after coming back from l.a. finished calc homework and studied for the gatsby exam and sketched a piece that i decided to call "dichtonomy."
i came home at around 930, ate 2 creampuffs that my mother had made, checked my email and read more of chopin.
she's encaptivating.
















the other day my baby sister said "when people get old, they die." and she had this perturbed look on her face and she didn't understand that people were born too, that even though people die, others are given life and that overpopulation is actually an international concern. i tried to communicate all that in language that a 5 yr. old could understand. i left the overpopulation bit out.
but when she finally understood, she had the sweetest smile on her face. that smile that tends to light up my world.
i think you grow to understand how precious family is when you look at them and the mere thought of anything happening to them wounds you, brings forth tears and terror.





there were beads of thought, each containing an increment of some intense emotion, a string of pathos fashioned by shaking hands into a braided, beaded trinket; a soft looking thing. it looked familiar and worn, almost feeble and yet intact in its beauty. i had been saving it to put around your neck, to fasten it slowly as i stood behind you, my pinkies gracing the nape of your neck as i slipped on the strand. i was planning on kissing your shoulder after i was done and whispering something lasting into you ear. this was what was supposed to be.